Where to begin... I suppose I shall begin at the beginning. First there was the Big Bang, which was big, but not much of a bang. Those astrophysicist types actually like to call it "the Inflationary Moment" I believe. Ok, maybe that's too far back...
So a few days ago I had some difficulty starting my K-bike after refueling. It turned over for an inordinately long time, and then just quit turning. So, I released the starter button gave it another try, and again lots of turning over, but no start and quit turning. So, I try again this time more turning over, and then BEHOLD it starts. I rode it home, which was about a 50 mile ride, and I get home, park it in the garage, and shut it off; wait a few minutes, turn it back on, hit the starter, and it starts right up without any issue. The next morning I go out to the garage, turn it on, and it starts right up, again without issue, so I ride to work, again about 50 miles. After work I go to start it, turn the key, and hit the starter button, and I get half a turn of the engine, and everything goes black. No headlight, no instrument lights, no nothing! Now when turn the key I get a whining sound coming from what I believe is the horn relay (furthest one to the right in the first row of relays in the box), and the tach starts to climb, there is a faint glow from some of the instrument lights, and the clock goes blank for a second, but will slowly come back on, but no headlight, no turn signal lights, no horn, and most importantly no starter motor turny over.
I have not installed any aftermarket accessories, ever, and there were none on it when I bought it. I have checked battery voltage, which gave a reading of 12.56 volts. I have checked and replaced all the fuses, just in case. I have cleaned the ever loving hell out of the ignition switch. Now I am at a loss, and I am hoping some benevolent, or at least chaotic good BMW motor wizard will help me sort this out. Thank you in advance for your efforts, and advice.