I know, this wouldn't usually be worth starting a new thread about, but this case is a little different.
My bike died as I was riding it. I pushed it to the local garage and had them install a new fuel pump. Rode it home. (This is the short version, that took about a month.)
I tried to start it a couple of days later and it would crank as usual but wouldn't start. It was really low on gas, so I put in a couple of gallons. Still wouldn't run. I pulled the plugs and checked for spark on the first plug, which looked fine to me. With some starter fluid in all the cylinders it would start to turn over but then stop. I could hear that the fuel pump was working so I figured I had some kind of problem with the fuel between the pump and the engine. I took a look into the tank and I could see that a hose was disconnected, so I slid it onto the nozzle looking thing next to it and figured the problem would be solved.
Still wouldn't start. I took the plugs out and tried to get it going with starter fluid 3 or 4 times. I tried putting a little motor oil into the cylinders. Nothing. I took off the gas cap and looked into the tank to make sure that the new pump wasn't just getting power but was actually creating pressure. It was. In fact, I could actually see it squirting gas up to the top of the tank... which didn't look right. So I realized that that loose hose was supposed to go to the fuel pump, not whatever I stuck it on (a little metal tube coming down from the top of the tank just behind the cap). I attached the hose to the fuel pump where the fuel was squirting out.
I tried to start it again a few times and eventually got a really loud backfire. I thanked god that I was still alive but I still couldn't get it to start. I could smell fuel at the tailpipe. I took out the plugs and dried them all off. Tried again but still just got a sputter. At this point the bike hadn't actually run in a month and I'd been using the starter and probably taxing the battery, so I put it on a tender for a day. Tired again and it sputtered a bit the first time, but wouldn't quite run. And that, my friends, is my tale of woe and folly.
So I'm guessing the problem was that the hose from the fuel pump came loose, and that's fixed but I must have done something else to mess it up while I was trying to figure it out. Is there air in the line from the hose not being attached to the pump? Is it just flooded? Did I really messed something up with my screwing up the hose connection? Or with the backfire, or what? Maybe an evil spell or hex of some sort?
Clearly I'm not that good at this, so please try to use small words.